Cause not everything is rainbows and roses
Growing up in the tropics I always wondered about this places that have actual snow for Christmas and not that synthetic thing that some people put on the cypress trees to make it look more Christmassy… but my priority was always to finish my studies to a point where I could take care of myself and find this places on my own. Along the way I got a huge interest for Germany, the geography, music and weather, nothing huge.
Fast forward to 2018: I’m financially independent and had traveled already to Germany where I met my husband, this led to the decision that got me to this post. Do we settle in Costa Rica or in Germany.? It was easy for me to chose cause everyone had good health in my family and I had always wanted to live in a place where I could see the 4 season every year and go out at night without fearing for my life.
But once you live abroad and you settle, life changes in both places and you can not be everywhere. Your parents get older, your brothers grow, your cats forget you (nah, well, my Piyu didn’t forget me yet haha) and also the scenario changes. Now you notice how living abroad also implies that you might not be there for ALL your loved ones in difficult times.
When I was about to leave CR I decided to almost shut the world down and just stay at home the last days I was there watching Netflix and talking with my mom. Lost some friends for this choice but I cannot stress how important was it for me to spend time with my mom, specially since she had recently retired and finally had some free time to just chill and relax. She always worked a lot, she loved her work, but now she had free time and I decided to spend mine with her. Best choice ever.
Little did we knew that the pandemic would crush my family’s trip to Germany to meet my German family but also that my mom would get badly sick. That’s why we decided to make an emergency travel and see her properly, cause the last time we saw each other we were not certain of anything. Now we are also not, but this was the last time I saw my mom, the last time we saw a movie together, the last time we hugged, talked about life and waited for the new year to come together.
This is the price we pay for living abroad, specially so far away. I understand it and so does my family but it will never be easy.
She just died (24.01.2021) and I miss her like breathing.
So, you leave your family hoping the best for everyone but you truly never know know when is the last time you see them.